Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Facebook [feys book]


1. I dun even know you but you are my 'Facebook Friend'

2. Q:What have you been doing of late?A:Oh you should see my status messages

3. Status Message:I had constipation this mrg

4. We haven't seen each other for a long time. But we 'poke' each other everyday

5. There are people who 'like it' when I vent my frustration, am sarcastic, fool around or criticize others

6. I need random quizzes to know who I am

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Like...Well, I mean...Basically

I often get annoyed when people talk to me. I know I sound pretty arrogant here. Had my mum seen this she would have already been half way through a lecture. But guys, my problem is not with people. My problem is well...like, i mean, its with Speech Fillers like the ones I just used here. Often people use multiple 'i mean' more than useful words in the sentence itself. Of all the speech fillers that are so annoying, I find 'i mean' the most annoying. It has multiple uses. Its used as a starter to a sentence. Sometimes as a conjunction. At times in place of a comma. And sometimes when there is nothing to say! This is what I hear at work. For example I have heard people on call, the person on the other side asks a question and its answered, "I mean...that's exactly what I have done". One colleague of mine has a notorious habit of using 'i mean' to start every damn sentence!

And the next most popular speech filler is 'like'. This is mostly used as a conjunction. Especially when something serious is being explained, this is more often used. For example, "Indian politics is in danger now, like its being run by a stable government, but.. like its not run by good leaders". This is something I have noticed in both Indians and Americans. Americans also excessively use this word. The next speech filler is the 'well'. This is used more as a starter. I have seen it more in writing than in speech. Speech filler for writing? LOL! But believe me, it happens. Sometimes its used to create a sense of importance to an otherwise mundane statement. For example, A asks B, "Have you been there before?" and B replies, "Well...I haven't been there, but I would like to go". And this speech filler is pretty contagious. I have often observed that the person who starts this, creates so much of a sense of a serious talk using 'well' that the other person also starts responding with a 'well'. Well... :D

Now I have noticed some words that are sole proprietary of the Indians. 'Basically'. :) Now this word, it splits me into laughter. For example, "Basically I am an Engineer". Ha ha ha...one is forced to ask, what are you otherwise? This speech filler is self explanatory guys. Especially fellow Indians would understand it :). Next is 'Actually'. I remember one classmate of mine in college who started every sentence with an 'actually'. As if offering an explanation. One popular instance I remember is when she was asked how a motor worked. She said, "Actually, when the lines of flux are cut...". I couldn't hold it. Especially because she was known for the usage of the word. And here in this context, it was like offering an excuse for why the motor worked.

Other speech fillers I have seen are the 'you know' and 'cos like'. 'You know' is more of a conjunction. Its used when you think the other person is just gazing without response at your talking. A sense of 'the other person is stupid' comes in and people start using 'you know' as if to wake them up to make them realize that they really know! The 'cos like' is something I have seen among Americans. 'cos' is a short form of 'because'. Because in itself is a conjunction, meaning 'cos' is also a conjunction (talk about the perils of colloquial usage of words). And as I have stated earlier that 'like' is also predominantly used as a conjunction, the use of 'cos like' makes it double conjunctions back to back.

I hope you liked this post cos like a lot of observation has been done here. Well...basically its about observing keenly what people talk. I mean, its an interesting pass time if you feel bored :D

Vivek

Monday, August 10, 2009

Religion, Kisses aur Makaan


Emran (or is it Imran?) Hashmi has once again got into controversy. Not because this time he refused to kiss his co star (that would have made many of his fans furious), but this time for not being able to his reasoning right. So here is how it happens. Emraan Hashmi, who has about 3 posh houses in Mumbai goes to Nibbana Housing Society in Pali Hill to buy a house. Now he claims he was refused a house because he is a Muslim. At first thought, it felt so stupid that I couldn't believe they actually put that on front page in a national newspaper! The guy doesn't have any facts, figures or proof to advocate his claims of being discriminated. He just comes on camera and says that he was highly hurt for being discriminated for being a muslim. He was supported with full fervor by Mahesh Bhatt (no prizes for guessing it). It seems, now its no more a question of a house, Mr. Hashmi is going to talk for all Muslims in India and fight against 'discrimination'. All said and done, it seems obvious that Mr. Hashmi has not been subjected to the Indian ishtyle of house buying/renting. This is a country where sometimes even Brahmins are not given a house for being too orthodox, and for many other controversial reasons. One can be rejected if he is a meat eater, a gay, single, a female, young, old, unemployed, students, gujarati, bengali etc and etc and all the many dimensions that us Indians have. So the point is that if a landlord has to reject you, he WILL reject regardless. Its his damn will.

The Nibbana society people now claim that the relatives (mother or someone) barged into the society meeting and demanded a house rudely. Thats reason enough to be rejected. Whats Emraan crying foul for now? Now even if he gets the house now, will he be even respected for his 'skills'? Oh, I forgot he has now stated thats it more than the house now. Its coming from a person who has never spoken for muslim issues in public forums anytime before. Did any of you hear any comments from him when the Sachar committee report was passed? Has he condemned profiling of muslims as terrorists? Has he objected to the wrong concept of Jehad thats being practiced by misguided young men? Its only when he is jobless (read uncle bhatt is not giving him any job) that he creates a sensational issue so as to tell the industry, 'Guys I am here! Please watch my kissing scenes and give me a role'

Talking about muslims being discriminated in India, has Mr. Hashmi ever wondered that had it not been for the secular fabric of our country he wouldn't be boldly kissing around in his movies and earning that dough that he wants to throw for buying a house. For once, Salman Khan spoke sense and stated the same. Is he forgetting that the first people to fight for minority rights are Hindus first? Throughout history all the social reformers wanting change have been non-muslims. My point is, Indian society has been more than welcoming to people of all walks throughout history. Caste issues are still a problem that we are facing and we seem to be taking a lot of time to get out of our pervert minds. But to raise critical issues, you need critical examples and not one 'mujhe ghar nahi mila' waala rona dhona. As I earlier stated, one can be rejected from staying in a house for a billion reasons. Why Shahrukh khan, Aamir khan, Salman khan and his sister and many other muslim actors live in the same locality of Pali Hill.

So, please Mr. Hashmi, you are doing more harm than benefit. For one, you may probably never get a house near Pali Hill. All the high society, scrupulous and haughty people of bandra might not like your 'middle class' ranting and complaining. Even if you do get, your movies might never be watched again. You may even start demanding only muslim actresses for kissing. And that would mean fatwa against you by your own Mullahs. All the religious-discrimation-ke-liye-ladna might turn against you. Instead, please concentrate on your kissing. Thats probably the only thing you would do well. Others have a better job, like instilling communal harmony. Lets 'kiss and forget' Mr. Hashmi :)

Vivek

Friday, July 31, 2009

Friendship Day - A mockery of Friendship

Friendship Day - A mockery of Friendship

The first Sunday of every august is celebrated as International Friendship day. And all people queue up buy gifts etc for their friends. Nothing can be more silly than an occasion than this. Cards and quotes are in galore about how beautiful friendship and how it means to everyone's life and blah blah. This whole custom of having a 'day' is just a gimmick to make the public go and shop thereby improving sales for the day. Improves morale, everywhere there is more purchase of booze, mobile phones, hotels are booked, cinema tickets are booked. All in the name of friendship. LOL! I find it very amusing because if friends have to meet and celebrate, they will do it anyway. This is like a call to prayer that a Mosque does. You don't have to remind your friends that you have to get together because its friendship day. Friends remain as friends regardless of a day. I am pretty sure Karna and Dhuryodhan didn't need a friendship day to celebrate their friendship. Just as how I am against the idea of a Valentine's day, I find the idea of a Friendship day really mundane and silly. Friendship bands! Boy they are one of the silliest ways of expressing something! It becomes into a vicious race to get the most number of bands suggesting the most number of friends a person has. Friendship is to last the test of time. Its is not valued by how and what gifts or cards one gives. It ain't necessary at all!

The only people who benefit the most are the shopkeepers, malls, cinema hall owners etc. I don't go around giving my friends a card and tell them that he/she means a lot to me. Friendship ain't depended on that. In fact, its only when you burden your friend's emotions by giving him gifts etc that you start expecting too much from him. You tend to develop a sub conscious feeling that you have to hold this friendship dear and any arguments ll damage and all that paranoia that one can develop. It becomes a sort of material commitment. If you have to gift your friend something, you can do it anytime of the day. If I have to gift my wife something I will do it on any day, especially when she has had a bad week or a month. Thats when the purpose of a relation is truly realized. That he/she is there when you need them the most. And not because they bought you something on a 'Friendship Day'. Costly gifts, forced plans of outings, disappointment if the day doesn't go the way you expect a day of such 'magnitude and importance' to go. And then forced words of endearment because! Because its the day! I can only laugh at pitiable extents to which people force themselves to. Instead how about this, your friend plans a meeting with you when you least expect, you get a ticket to a movie when you were just passing by the cinema hall, and your friend buys you something that you always wanted without he/she ever knowing about your desires. Thats when truest form of affection grows. Those little insignificant moments that have camaraderie filled in it.

We don't keep a day for the sun for it rising in the east. It just is! Similarly you don't need a day where you have to realize 'oh! I have friends, and I love them'. If you need a day to realize that, then I am sorry, to me, thats not what friendship is. I can quote all hunky dory quotes on friendship that 'friendship is limitless, friendship is beyond apprehension' etc and etc. Fair enough, if it is what it is, then why have a day? Its encouraging mass media who help consumerism. Thats how I see it is. One day of surge in purchase and chaos.

PS: This article reflect my personal opinions on Friendship day. I appreciate those who like it and love those who second my opinion :P

Vivek

Saturday, July 11, 2009

The Insulted and battered face of India, the woman

There seems to be something really wrong with the men of India. I am just not in a mood to start this post with flamboyant words. Anyone who has been following the news of late (regularly) can see that there is an incident of a rape every single day! Men with heights of perversion rape 3yr olds! How much more ridiculous can these guys get? Every single day we see a rape case. And invariably they always involve kids! I am not able to fathom if this some kind of new sexual preference. And its not as if there is this phenomena because these men have a bad lifestyle, deprived of women or something (deprivation also doesn't justify raping kids). To be very frank, there are enough brothels for these men to satisfy their desires. How much culture bugle they might play, it is seen that all men are inherently expressive about their sexual desires. Whether it is legally or illegally, men want to indulge in sexual acts with different women. Sex scandals are the most common scandals (at least no public money is lost there). Ok now I was talking about rapes here. Hardliners like the Ram Sena, Deoband, Evangelists who are always quick to attack women as the cause for the degeneration of the cultural ethos of India don't seem to have any voice in this issue? Why aren't there any fatwas issued, why aren't the perpetrators of such crime pulled by their hairs and dragged out on to the streets? (read Ram Sena) and why aren't the same evangelists who belabor about their opposition to contraceptives citing that sexual acts should only be for reproduction, coming out against such men?

Truth remains that religious organizations and dogmatic institutes for order mean no good to the society and only come out when popular voice is required. Thats another story altogether. Statistics say that in India, on an average, one woman is raped every 25 mins. Do your own calculations for the year. The rise in rape crimes has increased by 678% since 1971! 678%?! Thats more than the percentage increase in the number of women itself. And that still doesn't include marital rapes. How many women in India would be right now silently bearing the wrath of their perverted husbands. I do not want to list out the cases themselves because of the utter shame that I would have to feel inside for describing the crimes that are committed. What is certainly not fathomable to me is how many kids are getting raped. 5 yr olds, 6 yr olds, children who have hardly began to recognize the faces of their relatives properly. Why they wouldn't even understood what was being done to them when they were getting raped. Gang rape of these small children and then most of the times they get beaten to death! And we keep singing glories about our rockets, our culture, tradition etc and etc. A rape case gets published in the website of a news channel for a day and the next day its not visible in its main page. Not that we want it to stay there for perpetuity. But then, why aren't there national debates on such issues? The media created a hysteria behind the decriminalizing of section 377 of the IPC. The mass media hysteria brought up many a debates and gay parades throughout the towns and cities of India. Fair enough, gays and other sexual minorities deserve their due. India has grown and is more mature they said when 377 was decriminalized. I say, India will be truly mature and worthy of all the nice adjectives that are attributed to it only when its women are respected and given their due.

Whether we have a woman President or a woman PM or a woman Military General, it doesn't matter to the small girl who is repeatedly abused sexually in her home and in constant probability range of getting raped each time she wanders off to play. So much for a civilization thats probably the only living one that still has a concept of a Goddess. The concept of Shakti, the most powerful force in the Universe, gives tremendous amount of respect and adulation to the feminine being. We have to be more than just proud of such intellectual advancements that our ancestors had. The worst part remains when the rape victims are not accepted back into their family or that they don't get married at all. I call it indiscriminate, deliberately negligent and ruthless assault on the mental stature of a woman. Its like punishing an innocent person for a lifetime and then hanging him for wanting to lead a normal life when he gets released at the end of his term. I shudder to imagine what would be going in the minds of a rapist. How does he have a heart to ruin a woman's life and worse of all, a child's life. After the Austrian incest case surfaced last year, there seems to be a spurge in the cases of fathers raping their daughters. So much for taking inspiration from the west. One girl was repeatedly sexually exploited by her father for 7 years, this time with the complete knowledge of her mother because a tantric advised them to do so in order to get rid of financial problems. I know, the reader is bound to get stunned. The girl bore it all and when it dawned that her sister was also to be subjected to the same punishment, she managed to report it back to the police. In patna, a woman was sexually harassed in public while being paraded and then stripped of her clothes in full view of the police and the onlookers. Not a single voice of protest! Great Indian Tamasha indeed! None of them would probably face criminal action serious enough for their heinous crime. In news today, it disappears the next day only to be replaced by another 'story'. Highly gut wrenching, and sickening, each story has a girl who is left without a face for all her life. Above all this torture, society doesn't respect her anymore (for no crime of hers!). How much more hypocritic can we get.

Solutions. I truly feel having exclusive fast track courts for rape victims. Something the National Commission for Women in India should take up as a mission instead of demanding one third reservation in parliament. One third or two third, in the mass plethora of pervert men out there, women are always vulnerable. These fast track courts should deal with all cases of abuse against women because our regular courts have pending cases that will take probably couple of more generations to clear. However, care should also be taken to ensure that no false cases are registered as acts of revenge by women. Because women are after all, humans and not angels. Investigative approach to all cases but in a faster pace would ensure the criminals are booked and the victims are given justice. Secondly, I feel since the masses of India are easily swayed by talks of culture, religious morality etc, they should be used wisely used to bring some sense into the minds of perverts. A kind of mass campaign should be undertaken to ensure the men truly feel ashamed before they even think of committing such crimes.

This is a land where stories of Goddesses braving evil men and vanquishing them are known to every kid. The same civilization where God is portrayed in half male and half female form. The male and female attributes are in all bodies. As the Rigveda says, 'He, who is described as male, is as much the female and the penetrating eye does not fail to see it' meaning the male is only so much male as much he is female and vice versa the female is only as much female as much she is male. In a land where this magnitude of equality is attributed to women, why does our society fail to live up to its reputation and for sustaining this reputation, why is a woman's life ruined everyday and her voice of protest suppressed?

Vivek

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Ideologies and Belief systems

One of the things that I learnt after I came to America has been how ideologies, religion and subscriptions to various other philosophies that humans so much love to identify with, have been the reason for almost all of the world's problem today. Personally, I have always been fascinated by different ideologies and philosophical opinions of famous men who always stood by their opinion. Man, has always been subjected to evolution ever since he started walking on two legs. Though, till about 10,000 years ago the evolution has been primarily physical as in development of backbone, change in the physical appearance of the skull based on the location of habitat of humans, the last 3000 years in human history, has been the most dramatic as far as evolution of the human thought process is concerned. Philosophies of Ancient civilizations have dictated how humans thought, behaved and viewed their daily behaviour and also their relation with others. Philosophers like Plato, Socrates, Confucius, Vyasa, Chanakya, and countless other people of great virtue have taught and motivated others of their school of thought and virtually laid down the rules on how humans of a particular society lived their everyday life. The power of the influence of ancient ideas and philosophies is so great and so deep ingrained in the human mind that they continue to mould human behaviour even today.

If the evolution of the human thought has been unstoppable so has been the evolution of the respective ideas themselves. Religion is also an idea, a philosophy about how humans might be controlled by a superior power, a stronger being to which all humans must abide to. Religious doctrines and textbooks laid down the principles of how humans should respect superior personality (commonly known as God), how God is to be perceived as (and in some cases, how He (She?) should also NOT be perceived as) and the stand that the human soul has in this 3 dimensional world that supposedly has been created by God for the good of all creatures on earth. Religion also defined morals, values and virtues and in turn set limits to human behaviour. The definition of what was good or bad was no more a case of how an Individual benefited, rather how it would not harm the settlement itself. This was a marked improvement from a case when early humans were involved in a bitter struggle for existence and morals and values were individualistic. From 1000 different kinds of morals for the 1000 human of a settlement, it was 1 defined code of behaviour encompassing morals, righteousness and virtue. Therefore, the idea of a superior personality who not only controlled how the world lived each day, how every creature was born and how it died, and how the future of human existence depended so much on Him,was now dictating even the slightest developments in daily life and thought.

It is interesting to know that just like how Human physical evolution was different in different location of settlement , so was the idea of religion. Although the interaction of various cultures meant that ideas and opinions had several borrowed sections, the main motive of every religious doctrine was significantly different. From how it was laid out to humanity, to who had the right to present it to all humans was also greatly different. For example, the idea of peace and tolerance seem to have its first occurrence in religions of Indian origin (Vedicreligion , Buddhism), the idea was taken into the idea of Christianity, Islam and their various other sects. However, the idea of an eternal heaven and hell remained only with the Abrahamanic religions. Rebirth seemed to be part of the religions of the pre christian eras. The Vedic people, Egyptians, Native Americans for sure believed in rebirth and also worshipped nature. All of a sudden that idea was uncivilized and false and in many places the idea had to give in to Abrahamanic doctrines. My viewpoint here is not who borrowed from who, but rather how this became a part of human thinking. That a particular idea was not right and had to be replaced was the foundation of what is happening today among every human that inhabits this planet.

I am more concerned about how Idea replaces the very existence of a human. Today, man has come to a point where the idea has more value than the human itself. It is now believed that idea is eternal but man is not. This startling deviation from the selfish, self centered life that cavemen had is something so conspicuous. I find it hard to digest we become so obsessed with our principles, our ideologies and our beliefs that we fail to recognize the most fundamental thing about human existence. That all humans are born the same and work towards the same thing. That of achieving happiness in their lives. Regardless of the means, the objective of every human is the same. He wants satisfaction in what he does, happiness in what he gets. Of course, the means by themselves should not harm the prospects of another individual. I would not want to dwell on that part for now. What ideologies, belief systems do is give a set of instructions telling an Individual to lead his life and seek happiness. It turns nasty when ideologies fail to recognize what the Individual perceives as happiness. A cliched yet perfect example is that of an ambitious guy in a Communist country. The communist ideology denies any individual rights to hold property, hold demonstrations against the state, make free speeches and expressions. To be concise, the individual is stripped of any right to a happy lifestyle that he desires for. He is caged in a cage that tells him what to do and defines his lifestyle. That is a perfect example of how ideologies grow to the extent where an Individual loses his value.

What I observe is that one section of society always tries to force its ideologies and principles on other sections. Its a constant battle for owning the right to rights. For example, religious fanatics in SIMI, Ram Sena, Pentecostal Mission and many more constantly trying to prove other beliefs and ideologies wrong. At times resorting to violent means to prove their point. What starts as a morally and spiritually uplifting cause (Religion) ends up taking up people's life. The Korean peninsula was divided into the North and South after the defeat of Japan post World War II. The south was taken over by the US and the North was administered by the USSR (in both cases by puppet governments). Within a span of 3 years, the peninsula broke into a war of ideologies that has forever changed the way of life for the Korean people. Differences in ideologies ensured that what were proud, ethnically different, culturally rich people, were now fighting each other not because of differences in race, politics but ideology. Entire villages were massacred in the south for being suspected of nurturing communist ideals. And thats only because of suspicion. Imagine if any case was confirmed. The partition of India in 1947 is another story of an ideological divide. Religion is one of the biggest ideological reasons why the world is in shambles today. 'My God is better than your God', 'Follow my God, or else you will forever burn in Hell fire' and many such violent and preposterous statements are made to force people to change their beliefs. The point is, regardless of a belief system, we all want the same things. The preachers fail to realize that no matter what a man believes in, he still has to work to earn his bread, raise a family, have social interaction, satisfy his needs, get old, achieve his dreams etc and etc. Who has seen what is after death? Does it even matter what one believed in after he dies? The guy is dead! He is one with the elements and the ones who are alive mind their own business. All the Nautanki about ideologies and belief systems is worthless belaboring of stuff that destroys the few years that a person has to enjoy.

For the first 15 years of our lives, we are fully dependent on our parents who try to instill in us the best of behaviors, care and affection (not that it ever stops from their side) and providing us the platform to face the world. From the age of 15 to 20, we are the most confused in our lives. Social pressures, peer pressure about career, love life burden the first time mature brain bit too much. Then to come out of that, we are faced with the career building years of 20 to 30 within which we work hard to get a strong professional base, get married, fall in love (this time for sure), plan further for the future, party hard, go places that we always envisioned as kids, word towards achieving realistic ambition etc. 30 to 40 is devoted for the family with lesser holidays, more bad hare days, more bad evenings, insurance policy registration, kids going to all kinds of classes (dance, karate, classical music) apart from carrying a ton of books to school, lesser haircuts, tighter trousers and I can go on and on. 40 onwards is another struggle. The kid goes to college and takes to all kinds of 'cool' things thanks to its peers, kids now write competitive exams, bank loans are to be taken for the astronomical rates for college education, and if a recession happens then one in his 40s is in his worst position in the company. Highly vulnerable, he has everything to lose. Post 50 there is nothing much to say. So, the bottom line is that we have only about 10-12 years wherein we have the ability and the means to have lots of fun. And in that, if ideologies, principles and dogmas make us hate or refuse people then thats a sad state for humans.

Its very interesting that these man made ideas, man made rules, restrictions kill the very lifestyle of its creators. A baptist doesn't like a catholic, a Shia detests a Sunni, caste Hindus hate the dalits and so on and so forth. We fail to realize that life has much more to offer than petty ideals set by people who claim to work for social well being. US fought many a failed wars against communist countries so as to negate the attempts to spread communism. How much more can humans as a race stoop to? A point where we fail to see each other as humans but as walking ideologies. Even if a person subscribes to an idea, he/she has no right to refute the claims to others. One can believe in stones as long as they don't throw them at others. Man's progress is best determined by how much easier he makes his life, both mentally and in his surroundings. Strong ideological subscription leads to complicated thought, complicated actions. The reason these things intrigued me a lot after I came to America was because here I came across people of various ideas, belief system and behavioral attributes. The most conspicuous thing was that people were quick and unflinching in their attempts to express their subscriptions. Land of the free and Home of the brave indeed! The influence and the craving to attach oneself with a particular idea.

I would conclude by saying that ideologies will come and go. The permanent truth remains that man is here in this earth to survive and make the most of the one life that he has got. Taking anything seriously and in the process struggling to disclaim others is a futile and useless attempt. At the end of the day, no one really cares. Ideologies will not provide one with food, shelter and clothing. Ideologies will not make our dreams possible. Man's own willpower, own courage and hard work can take him to where he wants.